Novel: The Ultimate Blue Seal by Priest

Why do I want to die? Because I can’t fly. But why can’t I fly? Because I’m scared of heights. I’m afraid of the unmatched abyss below, I’m scared…that I’ll fall.

But so what if I fall? I’ll die…

Su Qing is a spoiled young adult who has never in his life made a living for himself. He lets other people take care of him until they are no longer willing to do so, with no long term plan.
But this time he is in trouble: Disowned by his family and deserted by his (ex-)boyfriend, he doesn't know how to pay the bills. Before much can come of the situation, he gets kidnapped by a mysterious organisation. In their secret base, he gets tortured and enslaved and thoroughly traumatised.

But he also meets others in the same situation there, and he finds that he wants to protect them. He wants to help these vulnerable people who are being hurt, despite Su Qing himself being vulnerable and hurt.
At the worst time of his life, when he objectively needs help the most, he stops relying on others and instead becomes someone others can rely on.

My notes (no real spoilers)

• Wrote my own summary blurb since I couldn’t find any prior to reading and it would’ve been really nice to have.

• I had to take a bit of a break only about two chapters in, because the slavery and noncon body modification aspect hit me harder than expected. Then I was unrelatedly in and out of hospital over months and had no time for reading. So in total it took me way, way too long to finish this. Fingers crossed for the sequel I guess?

• Started getting decent ca. 30% in. There were multiple times where I found myself growing bored, but then it picked up steam again.

• Su Qing’s character development in the first half was well done. And he is a good example of how the same traits that are considered negatives in some circumstances can be strengths in others. In the second half, he becomes more static.

• A little heavy on technobabble infodumping, especially in the first half.

• You might notice that I haven't mentioned the love interest in the summary. This is because the romance is an afterthought in this novel. It doesn’t really start until like at 80% in, and even then, it’s…meh. Not much going on here.
Su Qing and his journey are the heart of the story – read it for that, or the sci-fi, but don’t bother for the BL.

• The climax and ending were rushed an unsatisfactory.

• Overall, I didn’t like this enough to ever reread, but I did finish it at least. I’m also planning on reading the sequel, Itinerant Doctor.